I see a beautiful man across a crowded bar and he nods his head towards the exit. I follow him as he walks out, and feel him grab my arm and pull me into an alleyway where he slides off his jacket and guides my hand to his pants, letting me reach into his pocket and take his wallet.
I keep making eye contact with a handsome stranger on a plane. He walks past my seat and hands me a note telling me to meet him in the toilet in two minutes. I keep checking my watch in anticipation, then walk up as casually as I can. As soon as I’m inside, he locks the door, pushing me against it, then brushes my hair back to whisper in my ear, “Your student loan has been paid off”.
I’m at a pool party, and the last of the people have left. It’s dark and the stars are out, and I’m about to get out and pick up my things when the really hot host walks over. After a while of on and off flirting, I can tell something’s about to happen. He slips into the pool and leans in, then tells me to wait. I watch as he reaches behind him - I can hear unzipping - and then under his jaw, pulling off a prosthetic mask to reveal Beyoncé. A fireworks display starts to go off behind her, her body silhouetted against bursts of light that spell out, somehow, “75% of all Domino’s orders until the end of the week”.